Traveling in Pennsylvania is confusing and frustrating. The designs and laws don't make sense ... unless, of course, you are driving a horse and buggy. You see, PA was the first state to have interstates, parkways, and major highways. But as is so often true of the first to do something, it appears they got stuck there, and have not been as progressive as other states who followed after.
Even though they have some strange laws, and a seemingly overbearing set of laws and reminders, after being around PA drivers, it seems they need it!
One of the best KY driving laws is that we must have our headlights on if our wipers are on. I didn't know how great that was until I drove in a place without it!
PA seems to run slower. In KY, a state highway is 55 mph. That's all there is to it. In PA, a state highway might be 45, 35, or 25. Only rarely will you see one that is 55. I looked forward to 4-lane divided highways so I could drive 55! Between the speed limits and the road construction on PA main roads and interstates, I could have made better time driving country roads in WV! (and if you've driven in WV, you understand what I'm saying.) But don't worry, PA has already thought of that. They slowed their country roads to 35 and 45. I've heard it said that things go slower in the South, but I don't agree. But they know and understand this concern. A couple times, I came across a sign that boldly proclaimed, "Slow-Moving Vehicles." Isn't that the truth!
Perhaps these numbered signs are just suggestions, or perhaps left over relics from a bygone era. As it was, it wasn't uncommon to find drivers going 80 in a 55 zone, or on the other hand, 45 in a 65 zone (this is another funny story, but best not told here).
PA is famous for its toll roads. Perhaps they have gone a bit overboard though. I paid $1.00 to drive on their road for 2 miles!
It seems they are rebuilding PA. I believe that every single road I drove on in PA (which was a lot) was under construction. And remember, if the 4-lane divided highway was 55 before, it's 45mph with construction! They spent an awful lot of money on Road Construction signs. I think they could have saved bundles by putting up non-construction signs! "No Road Construction - next 3 miles"
Again, it is not accidental. PA understands how much road construction there is. In fact, on one road, they went so far as to permanently mount the road construction warning signs! (Yes, tall steel and concrete posts, complete with digital readout road construction signs.)
When on an entrance ramp to a highway under construction, there is a stop sign at the end of the ramp. You see, if you didn't stop, you might actually be moving fast enough to not get hit when you try to merge with traffic. It's always best to come to a complete stop, so when you pull out you can get t-boned.
In KY, when we work on a road, we put in some options. We might build a false ramp or a false lane, so you can get where you need to go while we are working. In PA, options are optional. I got the distinct impression that the signs should read, "Road Closed -- Too Bad."
As we were traveling West again, we were greeted with huge (overly huge) road signs pointing the way to Indiana. I understand. By that time, I wanted out of PA too!
It's not all bad though.
Driving in the country near Lebanon, I stopped beside the road to take in an unusual sight. It was late, and completely dark. Yet, the entire field, as far as the eye could see, was full of lights. Thousands upon thousands of lightning bugs were glorifying their Creator in a dazzling display like I have never seen before.
PA has features that would split an evolutionist's head open. For example, I drove through a section of vertical strata. Now, as best I understand, this was dirt that formed a thin vertical layer, standing straight up because of some air currents or such. Across millions of years, other thin layers of dirt also came alongside, all standing perfectly vertical. After a long time, some grass grew and finally held it all together. . . . VERTICAL STRATA??
On one road that had 3 separate ramps leading to it, they were kind enough to post a sign pointing to one ramp that read, "Enter Here." -- Thanks guys, I really wasn't sure which of the 3 ramps was for me!
I was arrested by another sign that ordered, "Do Not Pass." I stopped and waited for some time, but it never changed. Eventually, in defiance of the law, I passed it anyway.
I was shocked and baffled as I came to an intersection with a sign demanding "No Turns." Then, would someone please explain why this intersection is here!?
You know you're in flat country when there are large orange signs announcing "Curve Ahead!"
One area I drove through was littered with signs of recession. Everywhere I looked were closed businesses and abandoned buildings. There was one exception, which was even more sad. There was one business segment still going strong -- liquor stores.
As I was driving along a country road, I was startled to see a hitchhiker sitting on my hood. It seems an ordinary housefly had decided to use my car as an aircraft carrier. Glancing around, I spotted 3 flies riding on the hood of my car. How they held on, I have no idea. Just hitch a ride, will ya!
Some people are simply dyslexic, but they get hired anyway.
I prepared myself after seeing a sign announcing, "Left Lane Closed Ahead." But shortly after, the next sign read "Right Lane Closed Ahead." -- There's only two lanes guys - are you telling me the whole road is closed!?
Later, I was surprised to see a unique WEIS sign (Weis is a supermarket chain in PA). Someone had installed this particular lighted sign inside out, so when viewed from either side, the words were mirrored!
Random big blue question marks beside the road make me feel confident and assured -- NOT!
I did not take the turn to "Fox Run Equine Center." -- What animals are they working with, anyway?
The truck said "Hazmat Environmental Group, Inc." -- Say What?
I saw an intersection to "Plank Rd." -- I can only imagine what it's like to drive on that!
I saw a sign to the town of Export. Curious, I looked for the road name. Sure enough, the road was "Italy."
Actual road name: "Scenic Drive."
Someone's idea of a practical joke: I was initially confused as I approached a sharp left-hand corner. Someone had turned the second chevron upside down, so the first arrow pointed left, and the second to the right!
Beware what you put on your church sign. At first glance, one church seemed to have their own propaganda placard. Their sign read,
"Believe
Rev. Jones"
Ever been told you are stupid? In a WV rest area, I was greeted with this sign,
"If vending machines aren't working, contact WV society for the blind." -- They'll send a blind person out right away to fix the machine you can't make work!
Never trust Microsoft for Directions:
I didn't look over the directions very closely before I left (first mistake), and was understandably surprised to be greeted with my next maneuver: "*Check Timetable* Take Ferry (East)." -- WHAT!?
I approached a sign declaring "State Law -- Move over for stopped emergency vehicle." -- This isn't so odd, except that this sign had a police car underneath, having just pulled someone over. That was fast signage! Do they pay pennies to starving peons to set up signs whenever a car pulls over, or is this a pop-up sign off the back of the cruiser?
One day, I drove from Gas City to Gassaway, oddly reminiscent of my fuel guage.
A clear message is proclaimed by Rule #1 posted the softball backstop: "No Pepper on Fences."
I'm not sure why these fish were so worth protecting, but they must be real winners:
"Fishing for age 12 and under only. $50 Fine" -- I think most of the campers at that camp were definitely fishing for Ages 12 and up! Oh wait, or does that mean the age of the fish?
"Fishing permitted only by the following persons: ...
Persons so severely handicapped they are unable to cast or retrieve a line or bait hooks and remove fish." -- Now correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that mean fishing is only allowed by people who are completely unable to fish!?
There were similar fishing warning signs posted everywhere. Naturally, you would expect them to be near a location with fish. But they were prominently displayed all around a creek that ran about 6 inches deep, and I've never seen a fish in it.
Did you hear about the blonde who was stuck in a U-Haul?
She refused to exit a moving vehicle.
